In Part 1 of this series on Developing a Don't Quit Mindset, we covered affirmations and discovering your why. The next stop in our journey involves taking a good look at our environment and the peer influence of the people we invite or allow into our inner circle.
- Review Your Surroundings
If you are constantly saying negative affirmations to yourself, it is only natural for you to gravitate toward colleagues and friends who think similarly. Most people have an innate desire to be around others who understand where they are coming from. As American entrepreneur and author Jim Rohn famously stated, "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with." Research shows that our lives are heavily influenced by our relationships.
For example, If you are riding high in motivation, you will naturally spend your time connecting with other successful professionals to share strategies and best practices. However, if you eat lunch every day with a person that is not happy with their job, you will soon find yourself wondering if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. Without knowing it, we give a lot of power to the messages we receive from the people we spend the most time with. It is paramount that we choose our surroundings carefully.
The best thing you can do when you have those negative thoughts is to skip lunch with the "Debbie Downers" and shadow the all-star. If you distract them, you will not get their best, so I recommend trying not to get in their way by not asking them many questions at first. You'll get the most out of it if you watch, learn, listen, and take copious notes.
We are a product of our environment. Luckily, that is one of the things that you can control. If you don't like your environment, then change it. Those all-stars you are shadowing went through tough times; they had the negative thoughts, the insecurities, and found the other side. Seek out the people in your life that inspire you to be better rather than bringing you down.
- Create an Accountability Network
Another step you can take is to identify a peer or accountability partner with a similar work ethic and desire to persevere. You are not alone. It is helpful to know that others in your company or network share the same aspirations and challenges. You can gain much support and insight by watching and helping a colleague with similar objectives succeed. Without exception, perseverance and positive self-talk are included in those characteristics. Together, you both can move from negative affirmations to positive affirmations.
When you are in a cycle of negative thoughts, giving up can become habitual. Think of your accountability partner as a "goal sponsor." If you feel like quitting after chasing down your goals without realizing the results, there is power in being able to call a friend, peer, mentor, boss, or family member. This person should be someone you can count on to do everything in their power to talk you out of giving up. Relationships like these play a considerable role in resisting the urge to give up on your goals.
When it comes to developing a don't quit mindset, peer influence plays a major role. As the saying goes, you can not change the people around you, but you can change the people that you choose to be around. So remember to carefully consider the people you keep in close company.